Wedding Etiquette

Wedding etiquette is a subject for debate these days. Do we follow it to the letter? Do we simply forget about? That will of course be decided by each couple when the time comes and according to a number of factors. High society weddings will always respect wedding etiquette to the letter, whereas simpler weddings, planned by and for people who have a better appreciation of the simple things in life will have no need to conform to societal norms and rules.



A few wedding etiquette related issues seem to come up when people are planning weddings. One of them is what to do if you prefer not to have children at your wedding? How do you go about it or how do you let people know? Wedding etiquette teaches us that the best thing to do is to put this in the wedding invitations. The invitations should read 'Adults Only reception' or 'Adult reception'.

Under no circumstances should you use phrases like 'No kids' or 'No children'. Furthermore, nothing should be handwritten on the invitations. Everything that you wish to communicate to your guests should be printed. Also, once you have made the decision that no children should be part of your wedding, no exceptions are to be made. You should not make exceptions for any of your guests, nor should there be any children in the wedding party. If the unpredictable happens and some guests do bring children along, you may be tempted to refuse them. Although they have been formally notified, the last thing you want to do is make a bad impression by being inhospitable.

Another big issue for many of the couple is that of the cash bar. As far as wedding etiquette is concerned, the cash bar is not a good idea. People will be able to figure out why you have chosen that option and it may even start some rumor. However if the cost remains the issue, the wedding etiquette can be adjusted to the modern times. A solution that many people use is a combined approach.

Each adult guest can be provided with 2 drink tickets that can be enclosed in each invitation. This is a very good solution for a number of reasons. First of all, your guests will come to the reception knowing what to expect, they will not be taken by surprise. Also, 2 drinks per night are socially appropriate, as more and more attention is given to responsible drinking.

For these reasons this solution is being used these days even by people who are not concerned by costs. However, if you do decide that cash bar is still what you want to do, you should notify the guests accordingly and the invitation should read 'Cash bar'. This should be printed at the bottom of the invitation card. These are just a few issues, many others remain unaddressed. However the golden key of wedding etiquette is this: be gracious, kind and hospitable.